Acolyteboi

There's always something in the way

Mon, 16 Feb 2009 08:27:12 GMT

There's always something
in the way
There's always something
getting through
but it's not me
it's You, it's You

sometimes ignorance
rings true
but hope is not in
what i know
it's not in me..me
it's in You, it's in You

it's all i know
it's all i know
it's all i know

The process of letting go is not easy. Why do we choose to move on. I want to overcome the hardness of this process, become who i wanna be, live the way i want things to be. Maybe now I know you better, maybe i know the reason why this has to happen. I guess its part and parcel of life, a part where almost everyone has to experience. I know that this situation will come when I will have to let you go but still its a hard pill to swallow. Maybe all along this was a mistake from the beginning, maybe maybe i should have been better to you, maybe you were something which i thought you weren't, maybe i was just an asshole, maybe i'm regretting what i did, maybe i don't give a damn bout you anymore, maybe you just toyed on me. There are plenty of maybe(s). Hope this everything will be over... CAUSE I CANT FIND ANY REASON TO WHY YOU AREN'T WORTH EVERYTHING TO ME. I still love you and will always do. Stupid? nope i just learned to be selfless.... i just know the price i'm going to pay for loving. Go on and keep your heart beating.. I wish you luck

You Are My Sweetest Downfall!

Sun, 15 Feb 2009 08:22:23 GMT

Thus, I now feign maturity and make the choice I should have made days before. A part of me wishes that I have let go and a part of me dreads the day when I will. But in general, it doesn't matter so much to me because calling her(with a little token of our friendship) was closure enough for me. It's crazy because I woke her up in the middle of the night just to answer my call. And even though I fell in love with her all over again when I heard her voice, I knew that I was free from the chains that bound me to her or from the love that I felt for her. I'm telling you, I slept a whole lot better that night.

Its been quite a long time. I really can't write anything about my situation right now so I just decided to pin down a great article.

Love is the sweetest thing, I know. It's the greatest feeling. That is, if the one you love loves you back. There can't be anything better than that. But if the situation is wherein you're falling for someone who just considers you as i dont know, that's a different story. As much as possible, evade from those heart-wrenching situations. Love is hard to control, but try anyway. Give your best shot at falling out of love. You're lucky if you detect the absurdity and the pain of unrequited love right away, because it spares you from going through a lot of hell. All you have to do is simply occupy yourself with other things. Have fun with your life. You will fall soon, and this time you will not get hurt, because she will reciprocate the same feeling. It will not be now, but it will come in due time.

Love is all about sacrificing, giving oneself freely with no strings attached, you say. Hell, I know that. I know love is supposed to work that way. Love is really supposed to hurt, but that what makes love love. But this is my stand. And I know you respect that.

Love has pained me too much to actually believe that it is better to have not loved at all.

"It's hard to hold on to something that you know would never be yours in any way you think of. You just have to learn to let go and face the fact that while some good things never last, some don't even start."

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im sorry but ive got to move on with my own life

Sun, 04 May 2008 01:41:15 GMT

Honestly, I am on the verge of cracking. Sometimes I just want to wring people's necks while screaming "Pede bang sayo na problema ko?!!?!". Sometimes I just want to cut my throat and say, "Ok I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS!" while flipping my hair over my shoulder then walking out in the manner of a priss. But then I realize, that is not the mature way to solve things. And it was never my nature to easily give up on things.

Due to these realizations, my latest tactic emotionally was to admit mistakes and take responsibility for screwing up. I really hate complaining about love in my blog.

No one wants to be hurt. And no one deserves to be hurt. You see, all these years I've been building a wall between me and the word "LOVE", and I've been digging moats and trenches so that I could protect myself from it because I didn't want to get hurt. I built such a thick armor of defense around me so that no one could ever ever hurt me.

So forgive me if I'm not an expert at handling these things. I was so used to trying to just being on the defense. And during those times that I turned to you and begin a cycle of talks. It's just me being a kid. It's just me wanting you to be pleased with me.

It's just me being inlove with you.

I finally found out that there is something more important than yourself or your dreams... it is the person or the people you care about. If you cant find any reasons to live for, just try to think of those people or the person you value so much. As for me I found her but i just think that life itself was being unfair to me not to give her fully. I must admit that i had learned to value my life because of her and now that she's gone im still trying to live for the same reasons i have when she's still here. I just woke up finding myself facing the world alone, like nobody cares for me. Arggh so tired of thinking.

Acolyteboi

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There's always something in the way

You Are My Sweetest Downfall!

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im sorry but ive got to move on with my own life